If you’ve recently broken up with a partner you’re bound to be feeling pretty bad. It’s perfectly natural, understandable and part of the process. But, if you want to get your ex back, you’ll need to make sure that you don’t let your state of mind affect your behavior, in a negative manner.
If you’ve tried to get your ex back, without considering the outcome of your actions, you may have already allowed those powerful feelings get in the way of getting back together, by acting in a way that doesn’t reflect you in the best light.
The Impact Of Your Behavior
People who are distraught after a break up will often do things that they regret later. It’s easy, with hindsight, to realize that your behavior was unhelpful, but it’s not so easy to see that when you’re clouded with the emotional impact of breaking up.
Begging and pleading for your ex to take you back, crying on the phone, or simply calling or emailing them too often. These are the kinds of mistakes people make, just because the situation stops them from seeing things clearly. Well, it’s time to start thinking about how this behavior affects your ex’s perception of you.
As hard as it is, you need to think about the way your behavior is making you come across. Even if you haven’t made any major mistakes, as of yet, you still need to make sure that you don’t do anything which comes across as scheming or childish. There are ways to make sure you come across well, the way you’d normally present yourself.
Keeping Your Behavior Positive
Once you realize that your behavior is being affected by your emotions, it’s a lot easier to work through things in a positive manner.
You’ll probably already appreciate that giving your ex space is important, as it allows you both time to think, and it stops things from getting too intense in the early stages of a break up.
But what if you find yourself in the same place? If you see each other, coincidentally, in a club or restaurant, what should you do? Well, it would be best to just briefly say hello, without asking for any further attention.
If it’s not too inconvenient, you’ll also come across well if you offer to leave, in order to make your ex feel more comfortable. Politeness and consideration will serve you well, if you’re trying to get your ex back.
Whereas sticking around, and seeking attention from your ex will only come across badly. At worst, they’ll probably start thinking your ‘stalking’ them, even if the fact that you ran into each other was pure co-incidence.
Which is why you shouldn’t be calling your ex too often either. An occasional call, to let them know they’re missed, sits far better than constant calls, for any possible reason. Smothering someone will stop them from having the space to think things through, so it’s not to your advantage to be the ex that calls too much.